The mysterious and lyrical “Leeser” is as precise with her words as she is with her scalpel in the San Francisco operating room where she works. Luckily for us, she has graciously upped our culture game on the show with her poetry. Below are some of the selections she’s read on air.
To learn more about our mysterious rhyming gal, see her Facebook page
A Pizza the Size of the Sun by Jack Prelutsky
I’m making a pizza the size of the sun,
A pizza that’s sure to weigh more than a ton,
A pizza too massive to pick up and toss,
A pizza resplendent with oceans of sauce.
I’m topping my pizza with mountains of cheese,
With acres of peppers, pimentos, and peas,
With mushrooms, tomatoes, and sausage galore,
With every last olive they had at the store.
My pizza is sure to be one of a kind,
My pizza will leave other pizzas behind,
My pizza will be a delectable treat
That all who love pizza are welcome to eat.
The oven is hot, I believe it will take
A year and a half for my pizza to bake.
I hardly can wait till my pizza is done,
My wonderful pizza the size of the sun.
My Elephant is Different by Jack Prelutsky
My elephant is different
Than most elephants I meet,
Its ears are short and fuzzy,
It has feathers on its feet,
Its scaly like a lizard ,
And its furry like a skunk,
It sports a sort of auger
Where there ought to be a trunk.
It doesn’t much resemble
Other elephants I find,
Its tailed is like a mushroom
On its tiny blue behind.
It cackles like a chicken,
And its fourteen inches tall
At times I think my elephants
No elephant at all.
My Brother is a Doodler by Jack Prelutsky
My brother is a doodler,
He simply loves to scrawl,
He doodles, doodles,doodles
With his crayons on the wall.
He doodles on the windows,
And he doodles on the door,
Then doodles, doodles,doodles
On the ceiling and the floor.
All day he doodles , doodles,
He doodles everywhere,
If there’s no place to doodle,
He doodles in the air.
He doodles, doodles, doodles
On my pillow and my sheet,
And sometimes even doodles
On the bottoms of my feet.
I’m All Mixed Up by Jack Prelutsky
I’m all Mixed up,
I’m all mixed up,
I don’t know what to do.
I do not think I’m me today.
I wonder if I’m you.
My voice is not my voice today.
It sounds entirely wrong.
And many thoughts inside my head.
I’m certain don’t belong.
My eyes are not my eyes today,
My nose is not my nose,
My shoes are unfamiliar,
I don’t recognize my clothes.
My ears are not my ears today,
My hair is not my hair,
I even think I’m wearing
someone else’s underwear.
No matter what I write today ,
It comes out looking strange.
I hope that I can figure out
A way to make it change.
I’m looking closely at this poem ,
But still don’t have a clue-
Im all mixed up
Im all mixed up,
I don’t know what to do.
I only known it in cartons
My parents picked up at the store.
I recently saw where it comes from-
I do not drink milk anymore!
Paula Prue, I’m Mad at You by Jack Prelutsky
Paula Prue, I’m mad at you,
I don’t like the things you do.
You dropped ice cream down my shirt,
That’s no place for you dessert.
Paula Prue, I’ll pay you back
When I launch my sneak attack.
Some day soon I’ll get my chance-
You’ll have pizza down your pants.
A Teenage Hippopotamus by
A teenage hippopotamus
Is living overhead.
I hear him every morning
When he bumbles out of bed.
He crashes through his living room
and makes my ceiling shake.
A teenage hippopotamus is very hard to take.
That teenage hippopotamus
Is louder than a train.
He loves to blast his radio, its driving me insane.
He keeps it on around the clock,
It blares and blares and blares-
I’m moving to the place next door,
Where lions live upstairs.